You know it’s been a long time since you’ve blogged when you’ve gotten a blog request.
Kids are working out their own problems in another room. That’s a good skill to have at a young age, right?
Anyhow. I’m now 19 weeks pregnant with our third child. And we aren’t finding out the gender. As a matter of fact, we aren’t having any ultrasounds at all. Here’s why I’m blogging about this: not only does it seem to bother people that we don’t want to know what the gender is, but the fact that I’m an ultrasound tech means that others don’t believe that I can go 40 weeks without scanning myself.
There are just a few things: first, Brock and I have agreed that there are very few true surprises in life. This is one we want to get to experience. We already have a boy and a girl. We’re ready to find out at the moment of birth what our third child is. I couldn’t possibly me MORE excited for that moment!
Second, there was an ultrasound at 5 weeks to make sure there was a heartbeat. There was a heartbeat. There hasn’t been a single other scan since then. It has been 14 weeks since then, and the urge to look has all but gone away. I feel plenty of movement, and know in my heart that things are going well. The longer I go without scanning, the easier it is.
Third, I understand that I work in a hospital, alone, at night and I could easily scan myself without anyone ever knowing. (*of course I would NEVER do that because it’s against the rules!) But here’s the thing – I don’t have anyone’s expectations to live up to but my own. And the only person that would be disappointed by my breaking down and scanning would be me. I am the one that wants this, therefore I am the one that will ensure it happens. There will be no scans. Period.
At nearly half way through this pregnancy, I’m going strong. I feel good. I’m happy, powerful, and ready to birth another child. I’m ready to breastfeed again. I’m ready to hold a newborn and smell that smell and hear those sounds. I’m ready.
Not tomorrow, you know… but in about 20 weeks.
