Last night started out seriously rough.

I don’t know how hard of a battle to fight.  I know I want to sleep, and he wants to sleep.  I put him down in the bassinet, and he cries.  I pick him up, comfort him back to sleep, put him down – and he cries.  Try again, only this time, put him down in the bouncy seat, and he goes right to sleep.  I get so tired and frustrated, that it’s just easier to have him in the bouncy seat. 

My other option is to sleep him with me, and I’m not entirely comfortable with that.  I know people that do it, and I know people that don’t. 

Seems like once I get him to settle the first time, every time after that is easy.

Stress… 

I have 12 weeks of unpaid maternity leave.  I have to decide if I want to go back to working where I was full time, putting Ronan in day care, or if I want to take the chance of not having a job for a while in order to try to find something on the weekends so I can stay home.

I want to stay home.  I don’t want to put my baby in day care.

We can’t afford for me to not work. 

I need to take a deep breath, and stop worrying so much about this.  It will work out, some how.  Everything will work out.